For most of us, these feelings of insecurity and insufficiency (such as being unable to reach an intended goal) are highly situational or occasional. When they arise, we may, for example, brood about them for a time and then move on, deal with them by reminding ourselves that we have other strengths, or use them as motivation to master the underlying problem, says James E. Maddux, PhD, psychologist and author of Subjective Well-Being and Life Satisfaction and coauthor of Psychopathology: Foundations for a Contemporary Understanding. Even when major events cause our self-doubt to flare — being fired from a job or being dumped by a romantic partner — most of us are able to turn to friends and family and eventually find other ways to feel secure, engaged, and productive. But if you have an inferiority complex — an old-fashioned term for what Dr. Maddux instead calls chronic low self-esteem — you respond differently. You call yourself names, lament your shortcomings, and believe that your intense self-criticism is reasonable. Just when your self-esteem is most fragile, you attack it even further. This cycle is so deeply rooted that it consistently holds you back personally and professionally. “You get what you expect and people with very low self-esteem expect very little,” says Amy Flowers, PhD, a cognitive-behavioral therapist in private practice in Macon, Georgia. “It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.” As disappointments mount, you become more discouraged and more vulnerable to being biased against yourself. The result is a pervasive feeling of being “less than” across most aspects of life: psychological, intellectual, social, and physical. The good news is there are things you can do to curb these unhealthy responses, overcome your psychological distress, rebuild your self-esteem, and enjoy a more fulfilling life, Maddux says. The essence of an inferiority complex is having a collection of negative thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and tendencies. Signs you may have one, according to Depression Alliance, include: (2)
Repetitively focusing on thoughts that are upsettingShutting down out of shame, guilt, embarrassment, or an inward sense of defeatWithdrawing from coworkers, colleagues, or family membersDemeaning others as a way to transfer their feelings of isolation and failure
Psychology Today notes that a person with an inferiority complex may also: (3)
Feel responsible for other people’s shortcomings and failuresSeek attention and validation by pretending to be sick, depressed, or by continually bringing the conversation back to themAvoid any type of competition where their efforts might be directly compared with others; “People with very low self-esteem don’t take risks. They don’t try things and they end up missing out on many opportunities,” says Dr. FlowersBe extremely sensitive to both compliments and criticismsExhibit personality traits, such as perfectionism and neuroticism (a tendency toward anxiety, depression, and other negative feelings) (4)
Learn More About the Symptoms and Signs of an Inferiority Complex Genetic Predisposition For example, a study in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found that people who inherited a variation in the receptor for oxytocin, a hormone that contributes to positive emotions, felt less optimistic, had lower self-esteem, and felt less personal mastery than people who inherited a different type of receptor for oxytocin. (5) Family of Origin According to Maddux, who has studied self-esteem for decades, your early caregivers can have an enormous impact on whether a genetic tendency toward self-doubt is “exacerbated” or “softened.” A child whose highly critical parent repeatedly says things like “You’re stupid,” “You’re a klutz,” or “You never do anything right” may internalize those admonishments so completely that they carry them into adulthood. “When you are very young and impressionable and faced with constant criticism, you feel powerless, worthless, ashamed, shy, and unenthusiastic most of the time,” explains psychologist Elaine N. Aron, PhD, author of The Undervalued Self. “Feeling that it all must be your fault, you undervalue yourself chronically.” Society Unrealistic standards coming from advertisers, social media, celebrities, and other figures of authority can create or reinforce perceptions about one’s self that lead to enormous self-doubt. “When society bombards us with messages about how we should act, what we should acquire, and about what type, size, and color our bodies should be, we internalize and feel diminished to such an extent that it affects our own assessment of who we are and what our real worth is,” says Caren Shapiro, a licensed clinical social worker and psychotherapist in private practice in New York City. “People who have very low self-esteem tend to compare themselves more with others,” notes Flowers. “And when they compare themselves, they compare themselves only to the most successful people.” Learn More About the Causes of an Inferiority Complex
Anxiety Disorders “If you feel as if you’re not as good as others, it can provoke anxiety in many situations,” explains Dr. Aron.Depressive Disorders The link with depression is particularly strong; for instance, one large-scale meta-analysis of 77 prior studies published in the journal Psychological Bulletin showed that low self-esteem is a key factor in the development and maintenance of depression. (6)
“I don’t think anyone with a real inferiority complex can psych themselves out of it alone,” says Aron. “You have to have another person to validate and affirm your worth so that it becomes believable.” Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) “There is tons and tons of evidence of the effectiveness of CBT,” says Maddux. “What CBT does is, in a very structured way, teaches people to examine the negative thoughts and feelings they’re having in the moment and gradually change them over time by checking their validity. ‘Am I really a totally incompetent person who never does anything right, or is that a cognitive distortion?’” Cognitive distortions are thoughts patterns that erode self-esteem. According to the Mayo Clinic, these include: (8)
All-or-Nothing Thinking You see things as either all good or all bad. For example, “I’m a total failure because it took me more time than I said it would to write this report.”Mental Filtering By focusing only on the negatives, you distort your view of yourself. For example, “If I’m late to the meeting, everyone will know that I’m a loser.”Converting Positives Into Negatives You undervalue your successes and compliments. For example, “I only got the job because no one else wanted it.” “A person with chronic low self-esteem has learned to filter their successes out, to undervalue them time and time again,” Maddux says.Jumping to Negative Conclusions You reach a negative conclusion when little or no evidence supports it. For example, “My coworker went to lunch without me, so she must be mad at me.”Mistaking Feelings for Facts You confuse feelings or beliefs with facts. For example, “I don’t think I’m attractive, so I must be ugly.”
Psychodynamic Therapy, or Talk Therapy According to the American Psychiatric Association, “most people who receive psychotherapy experience relief and are better able to function in their lives.” (9) To get the most help out of psychotherapy for chronic low self-esteem, “the first step is to develop a really deep understanding of where this feeling of diminishment is coming from by delving into the messaging that came early in life and exploring the situations that reinforced the feeling of not being good enough,” says Shapiro. “Next, we help shift the focus away from what they lack to the positive things about themselves and their lives. Once we, so to speak, even out the playing field, we can then, from a position of positive self-regard, repair their sense of self-confidence and self-esteem.” Medication When an individual has low self-esteem along with certain psychological conditions, such as severe anxiety or depression, medication may be warranted. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of American, options include antidepressants such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) and serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs), which increase the levels of mood-lifting hormones in the brain by preventing their reabsorption by neurons. (10) Learn More About Treatment for an Inferiority Complex What’s more, an inferiority complex can cause a widespread internalized sense of self-defeat or self-loathing in entire culture groups that face stereotypes and discrimination based on age, race, class, religion, gender, sexual orientation, or other factors. (11) “If you’re born a woman,” for example, “you’re very vulnerable to an inferiority complex,” says Aron. Women have long been viewed in our society as inferior to men, she explains, especially in certain in fields, such as the sciences, sports, and business. As a result, even a woman whose self-esteem is intact day to day has to battle against feeling inferior in the workforce, a feeling that’s reinforced by factors like the ongoing wage gap between men and women and the lack of women in leadership roles. The effect is measurable, write Katty Kay and Claire Shipman in “The Confidence Gap” in the May 2014 issue of The Atlantic. A growing body of evidence shows that “compared with men, women don’t consider themselves as ready for promotions, they predict they’ll do worse on tests, and they generally underestimate their abilities.” (12) Learn More About the Complications of an Inferiority Complex
How to Tell the Difference Between a Superiority vs. Inferiority Complex
Another oft-cited sign of an inferiority complex is its opposite: narcissistic personality disorder, aka a superiority complex. How can the two be linked? Because, according to the APA definition, the tell-tale signs of a superiority complex — “an exaggerated opinion of one’s abilities and accomplishments” — arise from “an overcompensation for feelings of inferiority.” (14) As Mayo Clinic experts explain, although people with narcissistic personality disorders may appear “to have an inflated sense of their own importance. … Behind this mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem, vulnerable to the slightest criticism.” (15) Sometimes, connecting with others can help you work through symptoms of depression and anxiety related to feelings of inferiority. If you’re looking for support, the ADAA can help. Search for a support group near you or start your own.
Favorite Self-Help Tools
The Undervalued Self Can’t make it to a therapist just yet? This book by psychologist Elaine Aron offers deep yet simple to understand insight into why we feel sometimes feel defeated and worthless, compelling examples of how others have escaped feelings or shame, defeat, and depression, along with useful strategies for transforming your inner voice to enhance your self-worth. Self-Esteem-Experts.com Looking for ways to manage your dips in self-esteem? This site offers tons of worksheets and activities for boosting your confidence and changing the way you feel about yourself. Centre for Clinical Interventions This online service of the Government of Western Australia is a great resource for people worldwide, providing extensive information about low self-esteem, as well as a downloadable workbook for improving self-esteem.
Favorite App
Moodfit Looking for ways to reduce your negative thoughts? This app offers cognitive therapy tools that help convert those thoughts into positive messages, create new habits that reduce anxiety, depression, and other signs of an inferiority complex, and even track how well any mood-related medication you’re taking are working.
Favorite Video
‘Meet Yourself: A User’s Guide to Building Self-Esteem’ In this short TED Talk, Niko Everett, the founder of the Girls for Change organization highlights the impact our thoughts have on our self-esteem and shares some techniques children and adults can use daily to enhance their image of themselves.
